Ever
by i-luv-24
Summary: Tony and Michelle Fic. Set straight after season 2. They have to go undercover, but Michelle is annoyed with Tony. Chapter 10 up!
1. Chapter 1

AN: Just a little explanation of what this fic really is: This is a collaboration, by myself and a few others - on a forum over at So if it isn't a realistic fic, or there are other areas which you aren't happy with we apologize . It was just a little bit of fun for us, and we wanted to post it here. :) Hope you do enjoy it!

I was on my way out of CTU, today has been one of the best days of my life; I shared a passionate kiss with my co worker - Tony, I held his hand, and _I_ even asked him out! I was ecstatic that he seemed to share and reciprocate my feelings. But now, I'm not so sure. 'See ya tomorrow' Yeah! Nice, that guy really likes me! And then to top it all off, as I was on my way out, I walked past him and he shown no emotion what so ever towards me. He blanked me completely. He just brushed past me, walked straight up to his office and acted totally oblivious to my prescence - and thats not the worst of it, I gathered up enough confidence to confront him about it and he barely looked up, and said 'Im a little busy, we'll have to talk later' and set back off to work! Talk about show a girl how you feel.

I hate it when men send me mixed signals. He gives me the smile that melts my heart, then acts like I am just a coworker, so here I am sitting in my car, putting together my thoughts and trying my hardest to come up with a reasonable excuse why Tony keeps blowing me off. I understand he's busy, but it doesn't take much to shoot a smile across a room. I jump because someone is banging on my window.

Chappelle. Great another man. I roll down my window.

"Palmer is down this is serious. I need you inside." What nerve, but this is to help the president - and this is what I signed up for when I took the job, so I try put my feelings aside and do my job.

"Field techs are working up a plan now, and I might need you." He explained.

"Why?" I ask wondering what qualifications got me into this one.

"I need a man and a woman that can go undercover as a married couple" He better not be asking of me what I think he is.

"Carrie told me about Tony and your little ..meeting and she has some proof, but instead of punishing you two I'm gonna put this to use. Your welcome." He walked away. I can't believe this.

We walked through the bullpen into the situation room. There he was across the table he looked up and gave me half smile, which I chose not to return. We all sat around the large table and Ryan starts up. "You two will be going udercover as Joseph and Jennifer Bentz you got married a few weeks ago and decided to move to LA because you love the city life. Here are your life stories" He handed us these huge packets; full of reports, briefs, and photo's.

"We got married in Hawaii?" Tony asked.

"Yes" Ryan said, and I always thought that if Tony and I got married Ryan would be the last one to know where. Life is ironic.

I sat there, in my chair minding my own business - reading up on my new life story, when Tony asked me out to dinner. "Did you want to grab a bite to eat, so we can run through our cover story?" he asks. He's asking me out to dinner, but it concerns works - knowing how much I like him, or at least I think he knows I do. I think the whole throwing myself at him, and shoving my tongue down his throat is a little obvious!

I say yes because I want to read him, his feelings. We get up and leave, I follow him in silence; watching the way he walks. How does he hypnotize me like this? We get in his car and he drives. "So interesting mission huh?" He says glancing at me.

"Very strange" I say

"Doesn't seem too unbearable though" He says looking at me. Then he smiles and my heart melts. I can't help but feel like even though I instigated this little thing we are doing, he seems to be doing better than me.

I wish I knew how he felt. If he would stop sending mixed signals and just show me how he feels, I would be able to act accordingly. But he's a man and men are difficult. "Where would you like to eat?"

"I don't know." I think for a second. "You choose, just make sure its somewhere you can sit down with good food" I said, with a hint of a smile.

"I have just the place" He turns into McDonalds and I just stare at him. Men and their sick humor. He makes a sharp turn and within seconds we pull up to a diner. "Hows this?" he asks with a cheeky grin.

Oh my gosh, I love that grin, its the grin that made me fall for him in the first place, and the grin that gave me butterflys at the end of the day, and well this list could go on a while so I'll stop now.

"Its fine" I reply, forcing my most natural smile, and then I laugh to myself - force a natural smile?

Tony looks at me, raising his eyebrows, obviously wondering what I find so amusing. I just shake my head, and he doesn't push.

The dinner goes quite well, we make very little small talk, most of the talking is about work and the mission, but i think that's down to me - everytime we hit a personal conversation i'd steer away from it - and Tony noticed, so I feel quite bad, but then I tell myself I shouldn't feel bad; its his fault. And once we've eaten I get out my purse to pay, at least for my half, but no, Tony wants to pay - him and his mixed feelings. Or maybe it's just the way guys work in general.

"You drive me insane" I tell him as we are walking out.

He stops "In what way?" he raises his eyebrow does he think I am hitting on him... this has got to stop. Before I get time to think of a way to explain what I feel, I suprise myself with what comes out of my mouth.

"Do you love me?"

Tony stares at me, mouth wide open, obviously in shock, and well unforunately for me - not all too thrilled with my sudden personal question, or at least thats the way I take it. I go bright red, and have a sudden urge to run, and hide, but I unfortunately can do neither because I came here with Tony. But I could call a cab. No I should stay, I cant run away from my problems, at least not when I've got to go undercover as his wife.

So I turn and look at him, "I'm so sorry" I shyly laugh, "I personally blame it on all the caffeine you made me drink" I look at him, and say in a lighthearted tone "It sends me crazy"

Tony just looks at me, and I cannot read his face at all, and I hate it. Tony starts to walk to his car, and I just assume he's angry, so I walk in the other direction and call for a cab.

As the cab drove away taking me home, I looked at Tony's car. He was sitting in the front seat, still, not moving at all, he had been for the past 20 minutes. Hs seemed to be staring at the center of his steering wheel. As I was being driven home I couldn't help but feel like I have ruined what could have been the best thing in my life.

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Thanks for reading. We'd really appreciate your reviews :) We have other chapters, we'll post soon if your intrested. :)


	2. Chapter 2

AN: For the purposes of this chapter, the first part isnt Michelles POV, There is reason for this which you will come across later on. Please read and review :)  


Its 11:03 and Michelle Desslers phone rings "Hello?" Michelle answered

"Chelle?"

Michelle stays there, silent. Many thoughts running through her head.

"Chelle?" his voice sounds upset and broken.

"Tony?" She asks, not quite sure what else to say.

"I love you too" He said his voice getting even more unsteady. "When you asked me if I loved you, it hit me that I am, Michelle I am falling in love with you and it scares me to death that I didn't even realize it"

Once again Michelle stayed silent.

Tony began "It scared me because this is the first time I ever...well because Nina...I just never actually...is falling in love always this hard?"

"I don't know this is my first time to" Michelle quietly answered.

"So you are too?" He asked hopefully.

"I think I am".

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I had to be up early - as did Tony, for our undercover mission. So come 6.55am my alarm went off and I got out of bed to start my morning routine of getting ready.

We met in the conference room. I am so glad I got a full night's sleep last night, because the briefing was remarkably dull, I possibly could have fallen asleep in there. The whole time we were in there Tony seemed quite tense, and he always seemed to be elsewhere. Once we were on our way to our "home" he relaxed.

"I am so glad your here Chelle" he said with a smile. I like it but since when does he call me 'Chelle'? Yesterday he just froze when I slipped my affection.

"My name would be Jennifer Bentz and you don't have to start pretending to like me yet" I said.

"What?"

Tony just looked at me, very strangely I might add, almost like the look he gave me yesterday after the meal at the diner. Oh God - now thoughts of me admitting my love for Tony were clogging up my head.

"Chelle, You okay?" He asked, in what I thought was a almost sincere voice.

"I'm fine." I said bluntly, Tony screwed up his face, he reached for my hand.

"You sure?" He asked his hand now on top of mine - I quickly removed mine.

"Yes"

I really dont understand what happened but we have a mission to do so I cant ponder on it too long.

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We got to "our" house and I got out and grabbed my suitcase.

We headed inside, it was a nice house, not too big but comfy. We looked around the already-furnished kitchen and living room, It was tastefully decorated simple colors, this shouldn't be too bad, I thought. We headed up the stairs then the thought hit me. Were we gonna share a bed?

We walked into the bedroom looked at the queen size bed and looked at each other.

Tony looked at me with his cheeky grin, but also a shy smile at the same time - I almost fell a little deeper for him but I tried as I might to stop myself, I failed.

"Don't worry" he smiled again, "I'll take the couch" Just at that moment, undercover agents came in as electricians.

"Um, we've just checked the place out and there is surveillance everywhere, they cant hear but they can see everything, so you have to at least act like a couple" Well it was to be expected, it's not like professional terrorists aren't going to be careful about their business - At least they're not going to hear us.

"Looks like your option of sleeping on the couch is off" The agent said to Tony, the agent smiled at us both. "Im pretty bad at ear-wigging, I apologize" and then he left.

The agents left us alone. I was gonna sleep in the same bed as Tony Almeida, this excited me beyond belief, but I can't let it because he doesn't love me the way I thought. We went downstairs and looked into the backyard there was a pool and gardena nd a nice lawn. It looked like your normal average home.

"Hungry for lunch?" he asked

My stomach growled "Uh I guess so" He made us chicken for lunch and as we ate he started talking...

"So about last night" He said. I knew this had to come up sometime.

I nodded at him and took over, "Yeah I'm sorry about that..." I droned off, feeling bad for just leaving like that.

Tony scrunched up his face, he looked so cute yet confused.

"Uh, okay, so um, didn't you mean it?" he asked

I suddenly got a horrible embarrassing flashback of the "Do you love me?" scene last night. "Uh, well, I just, I'm sorry I don't know what I was thinking..." I said, I didn't sound very believable in what I was saying, I couldn't even finish a sentence without droning off!

We finished lunch and he seemed distant. The doorbell rang and he said "I'll get it" I followed him.

"Hi i'm your new next door neighbor. Peter Rangeli I brought you some Popsicles to welcome you to the neighborhood, I also wanted to invite you two to a barbecue at my house tomorrow."

"Oh hi I'm Joe Bentz this is my uh wife Jenn" he said indicating to Michelle

"Oh, hi, its a pleasure to meet you two" he said shaking her hand.

"Hi" Michelle said with a polite smile

"So can you come tomorrow night." He asked

"We'll be there" They said.

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	3. Chapter 3

It was the night of the barbecue, and me and Tony had checked out our neighbors in the way of wardrobes - so we knew what sort of clothes to wear to fit in. The girls are all young women, prim and proper, and a little more revealing than we were both used to, but not too revealing. And the men wore a nice shirt with jeans.

We were both ready; Tony dressed very nicely in gorgeous tight fitted jeans, and a shirt with the first few buttons undone, a little bit like at work but now he looked more relaxed and sexy. And I wore a nice short skirt, followed by a floaty v-neck top. (Safe to say both were secretly drooling for each other).

Now was the moment of truth.

"So, you ready?" I ask him.

"Sure" he says still very distant.

"So, should we hold hands or something?" I ask.

He nodded, his face not showing much emotion - I couldn't read him. He took my hand in his, and I couldn't help but love the feeling.

We arrived at our neighbor's door. "Hey guys so glad you came!!" We both smiled politely. Tony held out his hand to shake the gentleman's, who I recall as being Peter.

The men shook hands "Hey Peter"

I was staring at my hand which was holding Tony's, it looked right, and it felt so right. "Hey Jenn" Peter said, but I was still admiring our intertwined hands. Tony squeezed my hand and I looked up.

"Oh sorry I wasn't even thinking. Hi Peter!" I said, a little embarrassed - I could feel the heat evaporating from my cheeks.

"Here I'll introduce you to everyone" Peter lead us into the barbecue when I saw something inside that horrified me.

We followed on in, still hand in hand. I saw across the room a man that recognized, so I tugged on Tony's hand. Tony looked at me, with a confused expression, "Whats wrong?"

I was shaking my head and showing that I needed to get out of there fast, so Tony quickly excused us from the party; he politely told the neighbors I had stomach cramps and that we would be back over as soon as possible, also mentioned that we forgot the wine we had bought. I gave a smile that looked false, which worked to my advantage, because it must have made me look like I was in pain - because I received many, "Get wells" and "Hope you feel better".

We walked back over to our house, and Tony took me inside.

"Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god." I repeated as I paced the floor with my hands on my forehead looking around nervously.

"What Michelle? What's wrong?" Tony said with a hand on his hip.

"He knows me. Kenneth the man with the blond hair he knows me." I told him, looking everywhere but into his eyes.

"How? Who is he?" Tony asked trying to make eye contact.

I really didn't want to tell him, "He's... I just know him..." I trailed off.

"Michelle you have to tell me..." At that point we got interrupted by a cell phone, to which Tony answered, he finished the call within seconds.

"Michelle, the people next door can see us, we have to act rationally, incase their watching right now we need to get you a hot water bottle for your cramps, to at least make our story look realistic..." Tony took my hand and led me to the bedroom, "Stay here, I"ll go get it, lie on the bed" I gave him a confused look, Tony smiled and rolled his eyes "Your supposed to have a cramp" he explained.

Tony got everything he needed and was back in the bedroom minutes later, "Now Michelle, you have to tell me how you know him, it might lead us to something?"

I laid in the bed massaging my side and giving him pained looks. I could tell he was biting his tongue and I truthfully was biting mine too. "Michelle?"

I realize that I really should tell him. I looked up at him as he gazed expectantly at me. "Okay well first of all his name is Jesse"

"Jesse?" He says. He slowly leans over me, and I get butterfly's, this is very intimate. I'm about to ask him what he is doing when he begins massaging my hip and stomach, I guess trying to make it look like he was soothing me. I like it.

I giggle and whisper "I'm ticklish"

He grinned at me, my heart began to beat faster, and I got butterfly's in my stomach again. "Really?" he said in a playful tone, I'd never seen him like this before, and I couldn't help but love this part of him too - after all, who would wouldn't?

I nodded my head, and he climbed on top of me, sitting on my stomach but putting his weight on his knees, and began to tickle me. I loved him being here with me like this, and all playful, but then negative thoughts began seeping through my happiness; he wasn't mine, I'm never going to be able to be with him like this again after the mission, its all pointless - and its just going to get me falling for him deeper, and then in the end I'm not going to have him, so in reality I'm making it worse for myself. So I stopped grinning and laughing, and he stopped tickling, noticing something was wrong.

"You okay?" he asked me.

"Aha" I said nodding my head.

He laid back down on his side, and put his hand back on my side, "So where were we?" he asked, gazing off past my face, "Ah yeah, so he's called Jesse" he said.

I nodded, again, "Yeah, we met in a uh... bar" I said, really not wanting Tony to know how drunk and pathetic I was that night, but knowing I had to tell him.

"Okay..." Tony said.

"Well I hate him." I stated simply

"Why?" He asked

"Well I was out that night and Danny was there with me. Carrie was there too" I say, with a hint of anger appearing in my tone. "Carrie is a friend of Jesse's, so Jesse set Danny and Carrie up. He was just trying to get my big brother away so he could 'be alone' with me, but then he realized I wouldn't..do ...what he wanted me to..uh do...so he tried to set me up with someone else. I left, Danny stayed with her." I said anger rising in my voice at the thought of Carrie.

"Ahh cupid." Tony said. He's trying to make me laugh, does he like to see my happy or this is an act? I figure I'm being stupid at this point, of course he likes to see me happy - he's still my friend.

I just smile at him, he rolls me over a little bit more so were facing each other properly, and I suddenly notice how close our faces and bodies are. He looked straight into my eyes, and began "Chelle, about the other night - before we came here..." I didn't want to hear this again, I knew I shouldn't have said that, I'd told him already, why did he need to keep bringing it up.

"Look Tony, let's just forget about it and start fresh between us okay?" I asked. And what I saw next was... strange, Tony looked disappointed, and became distant - again.

"You okay Tony?"

Tony looked at me with his gorgeous big eyes, and said "You know what, I'm not, every time I bring it up, you never want to talk about it, you just wanna forget about it..."

Okay firstly confusing, why does he want to talk about it? Has he changed his mind? Or does he just want to understand what was going on with me that night?

And then we were interrupted by the door...

"You stay here" He tells me and runs downstairs. I hear him talking to the neighbors downstairs and I start to think about that night and what happened trying to make sense of it all. He comes back up. "Apparently we have been gone for like half an hour so we need to do something about this."

"Okay" I answer, "So how about you go over for about an hour or something and say I'm ill, like my cramp is real severe or something, just mention how it's nothing serious, its normal I get it every month or something, and just say I'm sorry, and gonna stay in bed, the after about an hour say you wanna come home to look after me for a bit?" I suggest, I actually get a tingly feeling in my stomach when I bring up the bit about him looking after me, even if its not real.

Tony smiled, "Sure" But I saw a flash of emotion in his eyes, sadness maybe?

"You okay?" I ask him.

"Yeah, I just..., woulda liked it us both going over together..." He said, and I was in awe at how sweet it was, but then he jumped in with "But now I'm going to go have to face them alone"

I didn't have much time to think about it because he came over and kissed me on the forehead, winked, and walked out. Where the hell did that come from!? I mean don't get me wrong I'm flattered but I thought that he didn't...well maybe he was trying to make it look right, but he didn't have to...which means he wanted to...but he doesn't...

I hate being a women sometimes. Did God invent us to be this over analytical.

When my mother told me love was complicated she was joking...Is this love, I wonder, I stop myself from thinking ahead anymore than that. Get it together. Come on now.

Tony went and left. I was alone. Trapped with my own thoughts. Great.


	4. Chapter 4

I went and got myself some wine, I was starting to get a real cramp now, and I felt awful - I was feeling sorry for myself - so I wanted some wine. I don't know whether to ask Tony what he wants from me, because I just don't know how he wants me to be, just a friend? a girlfriend? a non exclusive girlfriend? I wouldn't be able to handle that anyhow. I was on my third glass of wine - and they were big glasses - by the time Tony came back. Which means I was slightly tipsy...

Tony walked in and I could tell even in my state that he himself had had a few drinks, although he wasn't as bad as me, I thought, as I poured myself another glass of wine.

"How's your cramps?" He said smiling

"Ha ha ha" I pretend to laugh, "Aren't we when we are tipsy?" I said, not even thinking.

"You don't look completely sober yourself" He answered back. He had me there.

"Maybe I'm not" I said.

"What is that supposed to mean" Oh my God, are we flirting, since when was he this comfortable with me?

We gave up on that conversation shortly after that. Tony came and sat next to me on the sofa. I noticed how he scooted closer than usual, in fact a lot closer than usual - are legs were practically touching. Maybe it's just the alcohol.

"So how are you finding all this?" I looked at him, and answered, "It's fun" I said, noticing how his face lit up, "But a little scary" I added, he looked confused so I went on to explain "I've never done a mission before"

He nodded at me, he smiled a nervous smile, "I mean, how are you finding the whole us thing?" I was confused and my brain was just about to process what he'd said to formulate an answer, but as soon as he looked at me he said "You know, us having to pretend to be a couple"

"I can't understand it" I said simply, taking another sip.

"Understand what?" He smiles, knowing I am too drunk to hide anything.

"I can't understand why we have to pretend to be a couple" And it is then, that I realize, I have said too much.

Tony looked at me with his confused expression once again - and I then noticed that I have grown to love that part of him as well. I smiled at him, and being quite, well very drunk I began to have a giggle fit. It was a very high pitched squealing sound - Tony just looked at me like I was bonkers, which I'm pretty sure I am. Then after Tony watched me a few minutes he too began to laugh, he was adorable. Tony stopped laughing and went back to my earlier question.

"Well we don't really need to pretend, do we" He said smirking, "Because if anyone didn't know us they'd think we were a couple anyway, so we don't need to pretend" He smiled "People think it already"

Okay, so how was I supposed to take that? That he wants to be a couple, or that he just completely missed my point? Being drunk really didn't help my situation.

I laugh for a second, "We're like two peas in a pod" I say, putting my arm around his shoulder swaying back in forth. I am definitely, kooky. He just starts laughing, taking in the humor of the situation.

Then its the next morning.

I wake up sprawled out on the couch, something smells good. I look over towards the kitchen, and he is already cooking breakfast. I stumble into the kitchen - my head is killing me.

"Morning sleepy head" he says, putting a bottle of Ibuprofen on the counter. How does he do that?

I smile at him, thanking him for the ibuprofen, "Aww your a life saver"

"So I've been told" he smirked.

I winced from my headache, and he came over, "You okay?" I nodded, "Sure, it's just I'm such a lightweight - and i drank so much"

"I know" He laughed, handing me a plate of pancakes with every syrup and fruit I had ever seen, and he also handed me a glass of Orange juice - but suddenly took it back and replaced it with cold fresh water. I looked at him confused. "It'll help with the headache, and the hangover" He smiled again, he's in such a good mood.

I took the medicine and ate the breakfast, it was wonderful! He sat down with his own they both ate happily. "So how was the party?" she asked

"Which one?" he smiled

I laughed at this. "Yeah, sorry about that, I hardly remember much of it, its a bit of a blur" And I blushed profusely, and apologized again.

"Michelle, It's alright, I think we both needed to relax a little" He said, seriously now.

"Um..." I said clearing my throat, "Relax, in what way, because of what? because of work?" I said, unsure of where he was going with this and worried I might take this the wrong way and embarrass myself completely.

"Nervous?" He asked.

"Why?" I ask a little too fast.

"Because your playing with your napkin and you won't look into my eyes" He said, with a half smile, and I realize he's right.

I stop playing with my napkin. And I look straight into his eyes. Followed by a light blush, "Happy?" I grinned.

He nodded, "So your nervous? What about?" He asked as he moved a little bit closer to me on the breakfast bench.

"I just..." I stutter, not knowing how much to give away, then there's a knock at the door.

"I'll get it" I say immediately trying to get out of the awkwardness.

I stride over to the door only to meet the faces of our neighbors.

"Hiya" They both say happily in unison.

"Hi" I say back politely.

"We just wanted to check that your feeling better, Tony mentioned you weren't feeling any better when he came back over"

"Yeah a lot better, I just have a headache and hangover now" I laugh, "I happened to drink far too much - to numb the pain" I explain with a laugh, "You know what its like" I say to the woman, and realize I cannot remember her name.

She smiled, "Anyway, we best be going"

"Thanks for stopping by, it was very thoughtful"

They smiled, turned and left, I was about to shut the door, when the man quickly stopped me, "Sorry" He said, "We almost forgot, we wanted to invite you to a beach and barbecue party tomorrow night"

"Oh, thank you, thats very thoughtful. If you write down the details, I'll talk to my husband and see what we can do, thanks again" I wave to them and then they leave, at last. I'm not sure why I wanted them to leave, now I have to go back to Tony, and our awkwardness.

I walked back into the kitchen. He was still sitting in his seat gazing up at me "You were very convincing"

I chuckled "Can't say I've had practice"

"So where were we?" he said

"Um... I cant remember" I lied. I really didn't want to keep coming back to this.

He smiled, "I can..." he said, "But if your uncomfortable talking about it its fine..." he said sincerely.

"Uncomfortable talking about what?" I asked.

"I don't know, thats what I'm asking, your uncomfortable about something, and its bugging you, I can tell, I know you better than you think..." He trailed off.

I started biting my lip and looked both ways. I've gone all out twice, and with the kiss in CTU he returned, a lot, but with the 'do you love me?' thing he froze, but maybe that was just too soon. I figure I better just let him know, but there is still that little part of me that says 'you love him so much he has the power to crush your heart'. I want to ignore it but it's there and I can't help.

"Um... well, It's just about everything, the us thing" He just looked at me, I could tell he was concentrating, and that this conversation was important to him, "It's just so confusing between us, it's like were good, were not, and then it's like with the job we have to pretend were all in love, and it just frustrates me... its so hard" I glance at him. And then I go deep in thought, 'It's frustrating because the way we act, you know like being married, calling you my husband, I just, wish we could be.' I hate that I find it so difficult, to put my feelings into words. If my life were at risk and someone had a gun to my head I'd know exactly what to say, so why the hell is this so hard.

"Michelle?" I realize I've been quiet for too long.

"Um yeah, well the thing is, its just" I go a deep red, I get embarrassed when I can't explain myself. "I'm just being silly, it's nothing" I said, beginning to ramble.

I couldn't stand the way he was looking at me, like he knew I was lieing, and that I did want to say more - but I was scared to.

"I'm sorry, if you'll excuse me..." I said as I ran out of the room.

I run into the bathroom to splash some water on my face. I can't understand it, because, with other men, I can tell exactly where we are at, and what I want, and I can tell whether it will last or not, but with him, it's different. He knocks me off my feet. Thankfully not literally.

I am hopeless, I think to myself, as I hear a knock at the door.

"Chelle you okay?" I hear a gentle voice from outside.

"Uh, yeah. I'll be out in a sec" I say, turning off the water and drying my face. I take one last look at myself, and head out the door.

I look Tony in the eye, and force a smile, trying to show him - Yes, I am fine. I don't think it works. He just raises his eyebrows, and comments with "Remember how I knew you were nervous?" He didn't wait for an answer, "Well just remember, I know you better than you think, and when your ready to talk about whatever is bugging you, I'm here, okay" And with that he sent me his stunningly amazing Almeida smile.

I follow him, and start to help clean up when my cell phone rings. I walk over and look at the screen "My mom" I announce. He nods his head, as he loads the dishwasher.

I slowly head out of the room. "Hello?"

"Hey! How are you" She says enthusiastically.

"Pretty good" I reply, with a lot less enthusiasm than I just received from my mom.

"Well your gonna be better when I tell you this!" She says happily "I set you up a date with this boy James! Your gonna love him Michelle, he's so cute! He's such a gentleman..."

"Thanks mom, but ah" I tried stalling, whilst thinking up a valid excuse, then the perfect reason hit me, and I also felt better knowing I wasn't lieing. "Well, mom, I would but, I'm sort of on a - assignment" I announced, being careful not to mention the assignment was an undercover mission, as that would be breaking protocol and probably give my mother a heart attack.

"Well thats okay sweetie, we can sort it out for when you get back..."

"Uh yeah" I say rolling my eyes. I don't have the heart to break it to her - that I'm not going on another one of her not-so-perfect blind dates. They never turn out well.

"'Cause he's flexible, and very excited to meet you" She told me.

"Okay, well I have to go now" I say, ending the call with my mom. As I hang up and put my phone away, a thought enters my head that confuses me down to my core. 'How come when I think about dating someone, I feel like it's wrong? How come I feel like dating someone, would be cheating on Tony? We are not dating. I don't get why it feels so wrong. I brush it aside, and blame it all on the undercover assignment. It's easier when I don't have to deal with it - as is anything.

Tony comes in as I'm putting my phone in my pocket, "Professional or personal?" He asks with a smile,

"Nosy much?" I ask, with the same playful attitude.

He flicks his eyebrows in the air and curls his lips with a shrug of the shoulder, and then he lets out a breathy laugh. I smile at him.

"So we have some time to kill, what do ya wanna do?" He asks.

"Well we could go down to the beach..." He suggests, then glances at his watch, but doesn't wait for a reply. "We could order something in and rent a movie, go to a restaurant... and I'm all out of ideas" He smiles, he seems so happy here.

I smile, and walk over to him, tilt my head, and say "Whatever ya wanna do is cool with me, but I am beat"

"All you've done for hours is sleep and relax" He laughs.

"What can I say" And after I say this i realize, not much. "I don't no" I say eventually.

He looks at me "Or we could just stay here and do this little game that we've been doing these past few days"

And at that moment, my mind goes blank.

AN: Thank you all so much for your reviews! They are greatly appreciated, and as most writers would agree - greatly speed up the process of posting:) So please do review. And hopefully I'll have more posted up for you in the next few days. Thanx.


	5. Chapter 5

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AN: I Just want to thank everyone for all your reviews, I really appreciate them :) One reviewer mentioned it gets a bit confusing, seeing how there's more than one author, so we change tense a lot - Very sorry about that, but I must suck at English or just be used to it, because I've read through many times and not noticed it. Thanks for your reviews again. And enjoy!

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"I guess it'd be nice to get out of this house" I said with a smile. "Be a bit of a change" I add.

"Dinner?" He asked, pulling out his keys.

"Sure" So we left in his car, and started off down the road.

We sat in his car, silently for a few minutes. Then he spoke, "So?" He said, well he didn't say much - but at least he said something. I just smiled, I couldn't think of anything to say. "Where would you like to go?" He asked me. "

"Anywhere" I said

He looked at me for a minute at the traffic lights, and when we started driving again he begun "You've been really quiet lately Chelle, whats wrong, at work you always seem so full of life" He looked at my hand, and for a minute I thought he was thinking about taking it in his - But he didn't. "I can tell something is bugging you" He said. I didn't know how to answer, I think he sensed it because he carried on. "Well it might not be my place to ask, but I'm the only one here - so it's not like you have anyone to talk to, and I think I could help"

I smiled, and replied with a very lame "Thanks"

"See thats what I mean, I'm trying to make conversation and everything is one word answers, its like your trying to avoid talking to me. I don't want that, I care about you Chelle, if somethings bothering you, you should get it off your chest."

I took a big intake of breath, as I begun to think about what I was going to say.

"I just, this may sound stupid, but I just wanna know where we stand, because the past couple of days there has been so much tension" Tony parked the car as she was talking "And I just need to know, where your at, and if I'm in the same place because I tried..." Tony put his finger over my lips. I looked up at him and he sealed his lips over mine, bringing me in for a passionate kiss. (And to his surprise she reciprocated fiercely.) I closed my eyes, and enjoyed the feel of his lips on mine, it was so intense and hungry, and yet so very sweet at the same time.

"Thats where I stand" He said, smiling and getting out of the car leaving me. Shocked with my mouth open.

I got out of the car and walked over to Tony, "So, are we like? What?" I asked, not really making much sense, I was still thrown off by the kiss.

Tony just smiled at me, "Well, put simply, like I said that night, I want us to be an 'us'"

I was confused at this, when did he say that? But I didn't want to ruin the moment, so I thought I'd bring it up another time. Instead I smiled, naturally, for the first time in a long time - as I slipped my hand into his.

After dinner we decided to go for a walk since it was a beautiful summer's night. All through dinner we had made comfortable conversation, but right now as we walked down the street holding hands we are content with silence. In the silence I start to wonder what he meant earlier when he said "like I said that night, I want us to be an us" I never remembered him saying that. It troubled me, but once again I decided to ask later.

We eventually wandered back to the car. On the way home he bought us ice cream. When we got home we headed straight towards bed, seeings how it was so late. We got into bed on our separate sides but then he did something that surprised me. He crawled up behind me and snuggled me into his embrace. His body was so warm against mine. H moved up to my face and kissed me on my cheek, leaning into my ear and whispering "I love you".

"Really?" I said shocked.

"Yeah" He said comfortably. "Remember, the first time I told you?"

"No" I answered, totally confused. At this he sat up and said "It was right before you told me that you were falling in love with me" He sounded unsure of himself.

I said I was falling in love with him? To his face? When? "Uhm... Tony, I don't remember saying that" I said softly.

Tony moved his body from behind mine, and let his grip on me loosen, then he sat up, "You don't" I shook my head. "Oh"

"When did you think I said that?" I asked.

"You said that on on the phone. I told you that I was scared because I thought I was falling in love with you, and you said you were falling in love with me too" Tony told me, hope filling his voice, almost as if he were pleading me to remember.

Realization hit me. "Oh no" I said "I talk in my sleep sometimes" I said half-smiling. I felt butterfly's in my stomach, this was so embarrassing. How can you say something in your sleep - and have a proper conversation, and have no recollection of it, at all?

"Is it true? I mean.. what you said?" he asked. I could see how worried he had become, in such a short space of time.

A million things were running through my head; How much did I say? He knew this all along, when I thought we were just playing games? Is he serious about this? Does he mean it? What do I say? If I lie - he might know, if I am truthful will i get hurt?' Finally I decide on what to say.

"Well you said you 'thought you were falling in love' with me. Is that past tense?" I asked

Tony looked at me for a while, "Why, are you taking back what you said?" He asked.

I shook my head, "I don't think so, I just want to know if your sure"

Tony nodded, "I think I am" he said, this carried on a while. We were pathetically childlike.

"Thing is I am not sure what I said" I said, nervously playing with my fingers.

"You scared?" He indicated to my nervous movements.

"Um well...kinda" I admitted.

"Of me?" He asked. I shrugged my shoulders "Well just so you know I'm scared too"

I continued to shift nervously, Tony took a deep breath and began to speak again "You know what scares me the most?"

I looked up at him and shook her head.

"Is that this woman sitting in front of me, has all the control, she has the power to make or break me in less than 4 words." I heard and felt his heart and soul go into that statement. And I was so afraid.

I felt my words get caught, I looked at him with sparkling eyes, and breathed in "That goes for me as well"

Tony smiled at me, neither of us speaking, the silence covered the entire place with tension.

I started "We've been going in circles for days and.."

"I'll break the ice" Tony interrupted pulling me in for yet another passionate kiss.

I was shocked but happy nonetheless, I melted into his embrace almost instantly, and began kissing him back straight after that. A few minutes of passionate kissing later we pulled apart, "Um... that works too" I blushed. Tony smiled, amazed at his ice braking skills.

He whispered in my ear "love you". It was the sweetest thing, I had ever heard in my life, no words had ever made me happier. I couldn't help but return them.

"I love you too"

We smiled like school children, and then Tony lent towards me. "So what shall we do, we have that thing with the neighbors tomorrow, but we have tonight to ourselves"

He said with a cheeky grin - that I automatically decided I loved instantly. "Um, I don't mind" Tony rolled his eyes playfully. (She always gave the same answer.)

"Typical" He grinned. We both couldn't help but smile. "How about we just get cosy on the couch and watch a movie?" Tony offered. My face lit up, whats better than a night in, watching T.V - snuggled up with Tony?

After we decided on a movie we snuggled up on the couch, I had been cold all day, but at that point I was so warm and cozy and comfortable I couldn't even focus on the movie. All I could think about was the humongous weight that had been lifted off my shoulder and how good it felt now. All the while we sat there, Tony slowly, and softly ran his hand up and down my back. I was so happy and comfortable I couldn't help but fall asleep.

Tony was awake whilst I slept, I heard a phone ring in the background but blocked it out and tried to drift off again, but minutes later I was being shaken awake by Tony.

"I've just got off the phone with Chappelle" He said, not looking too happy. I nodded for him to carry on, "Well we have the beach party tomorrow night" He looked at his watch, 1.07am. "Tonight" He corrected. I shook my head, not following what he was trying say. "Well, that guy that you know, knew," He said, "Jesse, well Chappelle did some background research and their all really close friends so its highly unlikely he won't be with them"

My mouth opened, "Oh" I thought for a second, "So what are we going to do, I mean I cant keep missing every meeting we have it'll just get a bit fishy" I said, stating the obvious.

Tony nodded, "I know, So Chappelle wants us to stage a break up" I gave him another confused look, "Like I've got to cheat on you, and make it seem like its been going on for a while" I just stared at him, it shouldn't be too bad.

"So are you going to go through all of this on your own?" I asked him.

"No, um... Michelle, thats the thing, I've got to stage it with someone and they'll take your place"

I took a deep breath, I can handle someone kissing Tony and stuff, it's not going to mean anything, its for our job...

"Michelle... Its going to be..." He started, he was struggling to tell me.

I was beginning to get worried so I gave him a little push, "Tony, who is it, whats wrong?"

And he just said one name. And I wanted to be sick.

Carrie.

AN: Please read and review. Thought we'd give them a bit of happiness, but then we had to take it away... Tell me what you think by pressing that tiny button just down there. :) Sorry about the sleep talking thing... we couldn't think of anything to really cover up what happened.

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	6. Chapter 6

"Why the hell did Chappelle pick her? He knows we hate her!" I said, getting very frustrated. It seemed like, at that moment, all the happiness that I had just been given was taken away. My eyes started to water. Why am I getting so emotional it's not that bad, maybe I am over tired, but even still why am I this emotional?

"Chelle calm down" He said, slowly making his way over to hug me.

"Can't you order someone else?" Tony looked at me sadly, shaking his head.

"I already tried, but sadly I don't have the power to do that as a field operative, which is what I am acting as right now."

Tony held me for a little while, and then he led me into the bedroom.

"Chelle remember how there are supposed to be cameras watching us" I nodded. "Well I'm not going to be able to comfort you much more, we've got to pretend were going through a rough patch" Michelle nodded again, then tears began in her eyes. Well at least if they were watching, then it looked like he was already breaking up with her.

I walked into the bedroom and sat on the bed. I wish there was a place we could go where no one would see us, no cameras, no missions, just us things would be so simple. "When is she coming" I ask sadly.

"Tonight, I am supposed to make it look like I am cheating on you, you catch us, blah blah blah." He said, expressing his irritation.

"How exactly are you cheating on me?" I said "What are you gonna do?"

"It scares me to think of what I am gonna have to do" This just kept getting more complicated.

We sat in silence for a while, Tony reached for my hand, and said "Look I know this isn't fair on you, and I know you probably don't want to hear this, but I'm going to have to go a bit further than kissing her, other wise it'll seem a bit exaggerated us getting a divorce..." He trailed off as I snatched my hand away. I didn't like it, he was being so calm about all this, like it was all okay - like he didn't care. He looked at me with a shocked expression, "They'll still be watching us" I explained, giving a lame excuse.

"I need to go for a walk" Michelle said.

Tony nodded, he grabbed his coat, to which I responded by shaking my head, "Alone" I said, I could see pain in his eyes, and I knew I should be there for him too, but I needed to clear my head. "Plus this'll give you chance to invite Carrie round... to do stuff..." I trailed off, Tony shook his head at me, "What? We don't have to do it till tomorrow?" He asked confused.

I took a deep breath, "Yeah, but it'll be more realistic if you get away with it a few times, if I catch you the first time..." My voice got caught in my throat. I couldn't do this anymore, I had to go.

Tony looked at me with despair, "Michelle... You want me to sleep with her?" He asked me, totally unsure.

Anger flicked across my face, "Well what else can you do, you were the one who said you needed to go further than just kissing"

At that I just left.

The second I shut the door behind me tears started running down my face. The cool air feels nice, but it reminds me of how warm I was just not too long ago. Isn't life crazy? How can I go from feeling so good to so utterly terrible, in a matter of minutes. I start to walk down the sidewalk when I spot a swing-set in the backyard, so I decide to go there instead. As I swing gently I shiver and cry softly, until I hear the backdoor open and he walks up to me to talk but I don't even look up.

"Didn't get too far did you?" He said gently but I didn't answer. "I know your upset, I can only imagine how hard this is for you, and I just want you to know your not going through it alone. I hate it too. It may seem like it's easy for me, but I am the one that has to be getting over friendly with that backstabbing hoe."

At this I can't help, but smile.

Tony leant in to kiss me, and I was about to lean in when I realised what we'd just done. I began shaking my head, and then walked into the house. Tony, totally confused followed me in. "Michelle, what was that?"

"Tony we have to be careful, 'Us' is getting in the way of this mission, we just spoke about the fake break up in the back yard, they could have easily heard. We need to be more careful" I explained.

"That's fine, we'll think" He said as he moved towards me to give me a kiss. But I moved away.

"That's another thing, what I'm trying to say is, we're supposed to be going through a rough patch so "us" can't get in the way of it, maybe we should just wait until after this whole things is done"

Tony just looked at me, and sighed, then walked into the bedroom and sat down. I know that look, I think he thinks I'm playing games.

I'm not playing games, it just hurts too much to be with him because every time I am, I think of what he will have to do. I wish there was some way to tell him I love him and I wish we could just be together and not have to worry about Carrie, or missions or saving the day, or being hero's. I just being want to be 'us'. I go and sit next to him on the bed. "I can't wait till this is over" Is all I say.

"Me too" He says. "Wanna have a fake fight?"

"I guess it would be appropriate. They can't here us right?" I ask.

"No just visual so we can be screaming anything we want" He said with a half smile.

"Well Tony! What can I say its not my fault!" I yell trying not to smile at how ridiculous this is, but my thoughts of me smiling disappear when the doorbell rings.

'Oh gosh, please don't be Carrie' I whisper to myself. Tony heads to the door, I resist the urge to follow him, I have to look like I'm mad with him so I roll my eyes, glare at him, and walk in the opposite direction. It was so hard to do without laughing. Tony answers the door, I don't look, but I do hear that voice, her voice.

"Hey babe" she said in a low seductive voice, I felt sick. I peaked out into the living room for a split second just in time to see her push him onto the couch. I feel my food coming up my throat and run to the bathroom.

After I let it out I decide to take a shower, to keep myself busy so I don't catch them.

I was in the shower for almost an hour, and when I had finished I decided I would leave my hair down and curly - its more comfy, and I'm definitely not in the mood for getting glamorous. I decide I'm hungry so I walk through to the kitchen and make myself something to eat, but I make a lot of noise to make sure that I'm heard, I decide its been almost an hour and a half, and whatever they were doing I wanted it to stop, so I shouted "Do you want anything to eat?"

I heard a grunt come from the living room, I scrunch my eyebrows, "Sorry?" I ask. I hear shuffling, and the door close quietly. Then Tony appeared.

His hair is messed up and his shirt is half open. I feel my nausea stat to rise but I suppress it and repeat "Want something to eat?"

"Act like your making me something but I need to talk to you." He said, walking closer to me and in a very low tone started to talk again. "I need consent."

"What?" I asked, thanking God they had no audio on us.

"I need you to tell me it's ok." I give him a puzzled look. "This whole play acting thing, Michelle, I can't handle it, knowing you'll hate me for it. I despise myself for it. I need to know that what goes on in this mission wont affect us"

"Here's your coffee" I say not sure what else to say.

"Chelle?" He asked me again.

"What?" I asked, he raised his eyebrows at me. "Look" I begin to explain, "I know this isn't your fault, and I don't know how the hell CTU can ask you to do this, but I do know that you have to do this if we want to catch them out" And that, is what I want more than anything in the world - I sigh to myself.

I saw Tony breath out as he began to relax a little. "But, I don't know if I can handle it, I mean okay you've gotta do it, it means nothing, but its with Carrie." I said, emphasizing Carrie's name. When I speak her name, it tastes foul.

I was about to break down so I took a couple of deep breaths, Tony just let me gather my thoughts, and I continued "And its just hard, I mean, your doing things with my worst enemy that we haven't even done yet, and I just... I just don't think that I'll..."

I stopped sobbing and spoke very clearly "I don't think I'll be able to take much more" Tony looked at me stunned.

Okay. We hope you liked it. Please review. :) 


	7. Chapter 7

AN: Thank you so much for reviewing everyone. And I apologize for taking so long to update - I hope you guys still remember the fic… It's quite along chapter, so hopefully you can forgive me! J I will update in again in a few days, and then we should be near the end. I think there is maybe 4 chapters left. So hang in there with me!

"I wish I could hold you right now, but I can't." He glanced towards me, but didn't look towards the objects I knew he was referring to, and then he continued. "Damn cameras I hate this" He said obviously getting frustrated. "I hate this whole situation. The things I am doing with Carrie." He was looking me straight in the eye, and must have saw the panic in my eyes. "Well we haven't gone that far yet and I am going to do everything in my power to get around going much further." He reassured me. "What I am forced to with Carrie is not special at all. But when we make it thought this, which we will, I hope we can still be together and all I can do is imagine how special it will be to be with you. But first we need to get through this." He explained.

I was speechless, and somewhat calmed "I better go. I am going to bed. Try to be quieter I can hear you when I'm up there." I said giving him a quick kiss, which seemed to shock him "Technically we are still married" I whisper and he nods his head in understanding. So I head to bed. Alone.

I head back upstairs, and got into bed, dreading the thoughts I knew were going to ambush me. But thankfully, my thoughts didn't get that far; Tony walked in.

"What are you doing?" I asked confused he was supposed to be down stairs with Carrie. Again.

"I sent her home, plus it's a little weird how easily I am getting away with this, with my own wife right upstairs." He explained.

"You just wanted to come up and see me" I teased.

He grinned, "Yeah and that too"

He crawled onto the bed and begins kissing me; he laid me down and run his hands through my hair, as we kept kissing, until I stopped him.

"Do you think we should be doing this?"

Tony shook his head, "Not if you're not ready for it" I think I blushed at that.

"No I mean, I want to be with you, its just it'll be weird, how do we know if their watching us?"

He relaxed onto the bed next to me and looked around the room "Yeah I know what you mean" He let out a frustrated groan "I hate this"

"Yeah this mission sucks" I answered, then I began to giggle at myself, I don't think I've said 'Sucks' since I was in high school.

Tony looked at me his raised eyebrows, and I could tell he wanted me to share. But I just shook my head, and gave him a huge grin; I could feel my face glowing.

He nodded, accepting my answer. "I think I know a way" He said

I just looked at Tony, he gazed back at me, "So…" I probe.

"How about a shower?" He said.

My heart rate began to speed up, I could feel it pounding in my chest. A shower with Tony was something so intimate, and something I have wanted for so long. "How we going to pull that off, aren't we supposed to be distant?" I asked.

He got up from the bed, and left me for a few moments as he went into the bathroom. I had no idea what he was doing, then a few moments later he came back, a strange expression of his face, that I couldn't read.

"That toilet is really clogged up; will you gimme a hand fixing it?" He asked, trying to keep a straight face.

"Yeah just let me get my plunger" I smile, then banish it straight away. Now is not the time to give the neighbors any reason to get suspicious.

I was excited at first, and he grabbed my hand and led me to the bathroom, and then my heart started beating rapidly. As soon as we were in the bathroom Tony turned straight to me, and kissed me hard and deeply. I felt him go for the straps of my top, and all my muscles went tense. Maybe I wasn't as ready for this as I thought. But Tony continued kissing me, and then he moved to my neck.

I guess that was my weak spot because all of a sudden my knees went weak, and all my thoughts of not being ready vanished; overcome by deep desire. But he held me up as he started to take my shirt off as I did the same for him but then he slowed down and took a breath. "Michelle are you ready? I don't want to rush you, I want to make sure your comfortable"

"Yes" I said removing his shirt, as we continued.

Tony pushed me against the back wall, his bottom half firmly pushed against me as he continued to passionately kiss me. Then a thought suddenly came to me, so I pulled away. "You okay?" He asked me.

"Yeah" I nodded, "Its just uh... Is this right, I mean we are working. I no it's different than at CTU, but we wouldn't have sex at CTU" I said, slightly embarrassed at myself for having brought this up.

"Yeah, well can't say it hasn't crossed my mind" He joked.

I slapped him "Tony, seriously, we can't have sex here, its wrong, I mean does it feel right to you?"

Tony nodded at me, "Of course it feels right, being with you feels right, and were not having sex were making love" He stated.

We continued, without another second thought. I think it's amazing how in just a few words he can dissolve my worries and make me feel good. I felt myself come through and relaxed, and then all of a sudden to my horror I hear her voice calling his name from the bedroom.

I sighed, I knew what was coming next. We both hurriedly get ready and Tony comes out first as I quickly put my shirt on properly, but with Carrie not knowing I'm here - or maybe she does? She pounces on Tony and kisses him very passionately, as I walk out of the bathroom.

I stand there looking shocked and horrified, which isn't very hard; it's exactly how I feel. I find I can't talk, however, I feel like if I open my mouth I'll vomit. So I cover my mouth and let out a squeal. Once I swallow hard I can scream. "Tony!"

"No, no sweetie you don't understand we just-" He starts and I can tell he will run out of words soon so I figure it would be typical for me to just run out so I do.

I hear Tony follow me out. He comes up to hug me but I push him away, even though I'm playing a role I can tell I've hurt him inside. I begin to cry, real tears, but it looks good so I just let them fall.

When he sees the tears he stops dead in his track as if to want to say 'wait a sec are you ok?' but he has to stay in character so he doesn't. "It was just once. She forced herself onto me" As he said that I thought 'yeah you can say that again'. He continued "Baby I still love you it didn't mean anything."

I decide it's my turn "No! It does mean something! It means this marriage is over!!" I shout, tears still falling. This time I'm trying to force them, if my marriage is over, I'm hardly going to be happy about it.

"No. No it doesn't Michelle I'll do anything." He pleaded

"Okay, do one thing for me." He looked at me wondering what I would say. "Sign the divorce papers you will be receiving." I say taking my coat and walking out the door.

I stormed off out the door, and called for a taxi, I hated that I had to leave like that. I'm not going to see him for a while, we didn't even get a proper goodbye, and whilst were apart who knows what he'll be doing with that skanky hoe.

The taxi dropped me off at a hotel not far from the house. I sat on the bed thinking of the past few days. It was so hard to believe. The awkward beginning we started with, but then those few wonderful hours we spent together totally content, followed by a very rude awakening, but what I couldn't get off my mind was what happened right before the bitter end.

I smile at the thought, but only for a second.

I didn't know exactly what was expected of me now, was I supposed to carry on playing along like the bitter wife, who wants divorce. Or was my part finished and I just go back to working for CTU? I decided to ring Chappelle.

"Hey, it's Michelle."

"Oh" Chappelle said unsurprised "Stay where you are for a few days then get a flight back, use the card we gave you"

"Uh, ok" I stumbled, surprised at how much he did not care about what I do now. I guess I am just useless now. He hangs up and now I feel _completely_ alone.

I really want to ring Tony, and see how he's doing, and tell him how much I miss him already - but I can't. So I sit alone, doing nothing but channel flicking.

After a few hours of simply doing nothing, I decide to chance a phone call to Tony, I have to talk to Tony, and it's against protocol to contact family and friends when undercover, so he's the only one I can contact anyway.

"Hello?" A woman's voice says.

I sigh very loudly, not actually meaning to.

"Who is this?" The woman asks.

I don't answer I just say harshly "Put Tony on"

I hear her walk over to someone and whisper, "Honey, I think it's your wife" And then I'm sure I heard people kissing - but I push that thought to the back of my mind.

"What?" Tony says harshly.

"Tony?" I ask timidly.

I hear him start to soften up, but he's still trying to stay hard. They must be there - great timing Michelle, I tell myself.

"Tony can you call me back as soon as everyone is gone; I need to talk to you"

Then I hang up.

Even though I realize it was an act I can't stand it. I can't help but feeling like he doesn't love me anymore. Alone and unloved...that phone call didn't help. I fall asleep in front of the TV. I wake up to the phone ringing and immediately pick it up.

"Baby?" He asks sounding concerned

"Oh my god" I say starting to lose control of my emotions. I don't know why I am getting so emotional.

"Are you ok sweetheart?" He says even more worried

"No, no I-" I take a deep breath "I'm fine it's...it's just so good to hear your voice."

"Yours too...look I'm sorry about before the neighbors were over for dinner including that guy and it had to sound real. I told them you called to demand you clothes. You still there?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm still here" I answered. I so badly wanted to see him, I thought for a second, I could go over maybe - and pretend I was going to pick up my clothes? But the cameras, I smiled at the amount of times Tony had got frustrated with them 'Damn Cameras'. Thinking of him makes me smile. I should do it more often. Tony could come here, nobody would know, the hotel is far enough away from where were staying - or where he's staying.

"Tony... Couldn't you come over here?" I ask.

Tony stumbles with his words, "Sweetie, I would love to, I mean I will, but what shall I do about Carrie?"

"What about Carrie?"

"Well you know, she's staying here now." Tony said.

I took a deep breath, "Yeah, I keep forgetting she's taking over completely, I mean living there an all. Can't you just tell her, it's nothing to do with her?" I say, getting slightly jealous of how Carrie fits in with Tony's life at the moment.

"Sweetheart, don't stress about it. I meant if their watching us now they're going to wonder why I'm leaving her in the middle of the night, when she's only just moved in - I mean it's not normal..." He says.

I know what he means, you wouldn't move in with someone you were apparently in love with and the first night leave them alone, you'd want to be with them - more likely romantically. I was going to be sick. 'Don't worry he's not going to sleep with her, just be intimate - very intimate' I think to myself. However I wanted to see Tony more than anything, so I put all that aside, and asked him again.

"Baby I have to stay here tonight but in the morning I can come over for a little while. That okay?" He asked

"Ok I'm at the Chandler Plaza Hotel, room 124. I'll have them give you a key so you can just come in" I said, thinking maybe I was asking too much of him.

But I was soon put to ease by his light tone on the other end. "Sounds great." He said, and then I heard Carrie call him. "I have to go." He said sadly. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Ok, bye." I hang up.

I just lie down thinking of how lucky Carrie is, and how I hope to god that they don't have to sleep together, because that is so wrong - CTU shouldn't be able to ask you to do something like that for a mission, let alone have the nerve to do it in the first place.

I rang downstairs and explained about Tony coming and just to give him an extra key, the woman was quite arrogant over the phone but I just let it go, I had more important things to deal with.

I sat there stressing the entire night, but at long last I must have fell asleep because the next thing I saw was Tony sat in front of me in broad daylight.

"Hey how'd you sleep?" He asked stroking the side of her head.

"Terrible" I said sitting up and kissing him. He returned the kiss and to my surprise more passionately. As we continued I put my hands behind his head and he cupped my face, the passion rising each second.

Tony began to lie down on top of me as we continued to kiss, and then he did this really fluid flip so I was on top. "Michelle." He whispered in my ear, tenderly, "I love you so much." That just blew me away, I loved him so much too, and to hear him tell me it - even though he'd said it before - it was just so wonderful. I pulled him closer to myself as we continued to kiss; I needed him close to me.

"How long do we have?" I breathed out

"Not too long." He said continuing to kiss me and pull me closer

I felt disappointed at that, I hate having a time limit to being with him. We continued to kiss and I felt Tony's hand slowly slide up my leg. It felt so good. We continued to kiss, and Tony went to undo a few buttons from my top, but I put my hand over his to stop him.

He immediately stopped and looked up at me "Everything okay?"

"What about Carrie?" I ask feeling stupid, and feeling a hint of déjà vu. She seems to come up in our conversations a lot lately. But that is understandable considering our situation.

"What about Carrie?" He asked not quite understanding how uneasy I felt. I tried to think of words to describe how I was feeling.

Tony just watched me as I tried to muster up some words to explain how I felt. Clearly, I couldn't put it into words. Tony sat up and looked at me. I couldn't help but feel so guilty, I think Tony knew what I was worried about - constantly thinking about - because he looked so hurt.

"Are you going to be able to love me after this? Because I can tell this is really affecting you and if it's affecting you it'll affect us, and I don't want to hurt you." He said

"I don't know. I'm so confused." I started to cry. Typical Michelle, I'm forever turning on the water works lately. But again, I just brush it away with – its understandable, considering the situation.

Michelle and Tony didn't talk to each other for at least five minutes but the awkward silence brought them closer together into a hug.

"Tony the truth is I…" I look at him, trying to gather the strength to continue my well thought out speech. "I love you and it sickens me that you will be doing things with Carrie that we haven't been able to do together yet, and I know it sounds petty but she'll enjoy it and it feels wrong, but then again if we do this now in a rush just so I can get in before her it won't be as special it'll be rushed and it won't be because we really want to it'll be because I have to before she-" My voice starts cracking, and my speech comes tumbling down.

"Michelle. Michelle relax, relax sweetie." He said soothingly.

I sobbed into his shoulder, for what seemed like hours. Tony stayed with me the entire time, holding me tight, every now and again planting soft kisses on my face. I breathed in deeply. "What shall we do?" I asked him, "I mean all of this, is it worth it?" I sobbed.

He looked deep into my eyes "I know this might seem extreme, but I love you and I feel like I would do anything for you so if you're asking me if I think this is worth it, yes I do think it is worth it because I think going through hell and back is worth it to be with you. Which is good because I think this will be similar to going through hell and back" He smiled lightly, and I knew he was being serious about everything he had just said.

At this I feel a small smile on my lips, but it disappears the second his phone begins to ring.

Tony glanced at me quickly, shooting me a quick apology, "Almeida." He answered into his phone. He got up and walked around the room as he listened intently to the other person, "Now?" He asked, and there was silence, he sighed heavily, "Fine, I'll be there soon." Tony answered.

"Carrie?" I asked him, feeling that pang of jealousy again.

He nodded; "I'm so sorry sweetheart." I just nodded at him, trying my hardest to show him I was okay - Which was the biggest lie of my life.

He fixed his clothes and began to walk out, but stopped turned back and ran over to me kissing me passionately as I lay on the bed. It started out rushed but then it slowed down and became tender. He slowly pulled away and said "I love you"

"I love you too." I said as I watched him walk out. After a minute I got up and walked to the window. I watched him exit the hotel and walk to his car. His head was down and he was slouching, as he unlocked his car he looked back up at my window sadly, not expecting to see me there, but when he spotted me he smiled and waved. I waved back, but I couldn't bring myself to smile.

AN: I know this fic always seems to have the chapters ending quite depressing... But I promise a happy ending if that helps. Please review:) 


	8. Chapter 8

AN: Sorry for the wait. Hope you enjoy. :)

Well I knew I wanted to be with Tony. But that was the only thing I was sure of. Everything was so confusing and everything could all be linked back to CTU, every single bad thing that happened. That place is just plain evil. Surely there should be laws and rules against CTU asking such things of its employees. Sighing, knowing I wouldn't ever understand this current situation, and that I really didn't care whether it was against regulations for CTU asking us to do this; we were here now, so all I wanted was for it to be simply over.

I decided to have a bath, it would give me something to do, but I most certainly deserved a pamper session.

I just laid down in my hot bath, I let me head lean back into the bubbles, and even though I was still so tense I just felt my entire body relax. And then my phone rang. What a surprise, I think to myself.

"Dessler" I answered.

"Back off or I'll tell Chappelle what you've been doing" said a sly voice that I unfortunately knew well.

"Excuse me?"

"You are jeopardizing the mission with this little fling you're having with Tony" Carrie told me bitchily.

This was not a fling first of all, but I did not care to let her in on the details of our relationship. "_You _are jeopardizing the mission by saying Ryan's name while under cover, and probably under watch too"

She hung up. I hate Carrie.

I sat in the steaming hot bath, thinking of what a careless bitch she had just been. If this mission has been ruined because of her, god I'm gonna -

My damn phone. Again.

"Dessler"

"Hi Michelle, It's Chappelle. I know we said your done but your going to have to do us one last favor." He stated.

"Okay..." I said, unsure of his request.

"Well... We need you to go back to the house, whilst Tony and Carrie are out with your neighbors"

"Yeah..."

"And well, check they don't suspect anything." He told me, but when no reply came he continued. "Just as a safety measure." He added

"That's fine, is that all?"

"Well if you could try and find anything out about them whilst there out, without putting yourself in danger of course..."

"Will do Ryan."

"Thanks, get back to us when its done" He hung up.

Well this might not be so bad, I can snoop, see what Carrie has been up to with Tony... My mind was running ten to the dozen.

I pulled up to the house and got out. "Hey Michelle!" One of the older neighbors yelled from across the street as she was watering her flowers. She set down her hose and walked over. "So I am sorry to hear about your divorce"

"Yeah me too. I never saw it coming" I said telling the full truth.

"So, I hope you don't mind me bringing it up, but he was cheating?" She asked timidly, I wanted to tell her not to be nosy, and keep out of other peoples personal lives, but I didn't; I was stressed, and it wasn't fair to take it out on a friendly neighbor. Even if she was relatively nosy.

"Yeah, typical." I said trying to sound bitter.

"So whatcha doing?" She asked me, she really couldn't keep out of other people's lives. But this could work to my advantage.

"I've come to get some more of my stuff. I asked for him to bring me clothes and what does he bring? The ugliest things I own. Men." I tish bitterly.

She chuckled "Yeah, well that stinks. I'm so sorry we couldn't have been neighbors for longer. You seem nice, unlike our other neighbors...they are not exactly neighborly. They are kind of quiet and strange, except since you moved here, they have been friendlier."

"Must be my charm" I said, with a small grin, trying to lighten the mood that was forming. I couldn't deal with anymore tension and stress.

The lady smiled at me, "Well I'll let you get your things then" She smiled, and headed back over to her lawn.

I waved and smiled politely, but tried not to look to cheerful at the same time. I hate this whole thing, its so awkward, and down right confusing.

I walked into our house, starting in the living room, I found nothing. I searched the kitchen and thought I found a small hearing device but turns out it was the world's tiniest light bulb. So I decided to check the bedroom, which I regret.

I walked in and there is clothes strewn about everywhere, some of Tony's, and none of mine, and lots of Carries, including a large amount of underwear. I'd practically finished anyway, so I began on my way out, I thought I'd try check the neighbors first, but as I came towards the door, it opened. And in come Tony and Carrie giggling and kissing through the door way.

Not seeing me they flung the door open and I got squashed behind it. They continued into the living room falling onto the couch. "This is sick" I heard him mutter over and over. "This is wrong I hate this-"

"Stop trying to pretend your not enjoying this" She said seductively.

"Stop trying to pretend this is real" He said angrily.

As they started shaving clothes I felt my lunch come up my throat.

I stayed their quietly for a few minutes.

They were still being intimate, but Tony kept muttering rude words, "I know you want me" Carrie would mutter. Nothing seemed to shut her up. I stood there watching for what seemed like hours, I just froze, I seriously didn't know what to do. But when I saw Tony forcefully kiss Carrie - I had to get out of there.

I knew the neighbors would be able to see this on camera - I had to do something.

I coughed and walked out in front of them.

"Oh don't mind me" I said grabbing my purse, they both looked at me, one very confused, and the other so hurt. "I mean do it behind my back, do it in front of me, what's the difference?" That was all I managed, it was tearing me apart. So I made a run for the door.

I had only made it two steps out the door when Tony had caught up to me. He was only in his pants which he had thrown back on "Michelle-"

I turned around at him noticing that their target neighbors were sitting out on their porch with their laptop "I can't believe you! All I wanted was my clothes. Not a goddamn show!"

"But Mi-"

"No don't even start, every time you talk it's always a lie, so just stop. I don't want to hear anymore of the lies." I began to feel bad about having to yell at him like that, but they were watching.

"Chelle... Please... It was a mistake" He pleaded. I knew he was just acting, but I was melting for him.

He moved towards me at a quickened pace, he pulled my face close to his, and passionately kissed me. I sunk into his kiss for a few minutes then I pulled back. Everyone was watching still. Thankfully Carrie was inside - for the moment anyway. I glared at Tony, "What was that?" I asked hard. He seemed hurt, but we had to make it realistic. So I slapped him.

"You were a mistake" I said. He looked taken aback by that, as if he wasn't sure whether it was real or not. God this is confusing.

I tried to think of something to say that would only pertain to our fake situation so he would know I was just acting "How could you cheat on me..." That didn't help. "You said forever when we got married. You lied." I said getting into my car and driving away angrily.

Except I wasn't angry. I felt terrible.

I drove away, and surprisingly I didn't break down crying. I just thought about all of this. It made me sick knowing Carrie and him were... I can't keep thinking of this I'm just going round in circles. So I drove home. Or to the hotel, it wasn't much of a home. I put my music on loudly so it would stop me from thinking to deeply. So I eventually began to relax. My phone rang - I'm considering getting rid of it!

"Dessler?"

"What did you find out" Chappelle demanded.

"Ugh. Well they have really nosy neighbors who think they are fishy. Everyone completely believes the cover, especially after the show we wound up putting on."

"Show?"

"Tony and Carrie came home early. I left rather quickly and he followed me. I screamed at him like a woman who's been cheated on. They happened to be watching. They believe it. I'm done...right?"

Chappelle didn't reply to that, I just heard heavy breathing from his end.

"Well?" I asked.

"That's not completely true..." He sighed.

"So you need me to get involved again?" I asked, slightly hopeful - I could keep an eye on Carrie, or maybe they didn't even need her anymore.

"Well, what we need you to do is..."

"Well, what we need you to do is haunt him for awhile." Chappelle said. "I mean I know you've seen a divorce before in your family" That hurt, but I didn't say anything, I just bit my lip and kept listening. "You know it's never a clean break there is always a series of fights and debates over who gets what so..."

"How long do I have to keep this up?" I ask

"Well, I don't think we can put a time limit on this Michelle, I think you just have to keep it going until the divorce and everything is final - Which I was told takes about 12 months"

"Were actually getting a divorce?"

"Yes" Chappelle said simply.

"No, I mean an actual one, by law?"

"Oh no, we just have to play by how you would get it done, we've got you both a lawyer, and explained the situation, they're going to play along by government order." Chappelle explained to me. "They're good at what they do Michelle." I figured he was talking about the neighbors. "We have to make everything as believable as possible; we can't have them getting suspicious. You know how important this is."

I sighed, I knew he was right. "So how shall I start?" I asked.

"Well we want you to be the annoying wife, so you have to go and say your not moving out, its your house, he did the cheating so he should move etc, but he's going to be stubborn. Well anyway the rest is up to you two, but we want all three of you in the house, that way there's more chance of you getting information, and people wont think it suspicious you being there - well because your living there again." Chappelle explained quite thoroughly.

"Okay" I said, I didn't need him to say anything more. But then I suddenly thought of something. "What about that guy? Jesse? I mean I had to come out of the mission because he knew me… So what's the difference now?" I asked.

"Well, we had him removed." Chappelle told me.

Now I was confused. "What?"

"We have detained him for as long as we need to – the neighbors think he has gone on a business trip."

"I get that, but if you have detained him, why did Carrie have to take my place?"

I heard Chappelle take a deep breath, and then breathed out just as deeply. "Well, Michelle, I didn't want to bring this up until after the mission. But, Carrie informed us that you and Tony had something going on. I don't think I need to explain how we feel about interoffice relationships." He scolded.

"Not that it is any of your business Chappelle, but you had no need to remove me." I sighed, "And if you were going to, you could have at least told me the real reason, instead of keeping me in the dark." I told him harshly.

And then it hit me, it should have been obvious that they knew about Tony and I. They wouldn't have sent _Carrie_ in; she knew Jesse too. It all made sense. Carrie. I tense my jaw at the thought. She obviously went to Chappelle telling him about Tony and I, and then offered to go in as my replacement. Jesse had nothing to do with it, not really. My heart is beating faster at my new revelation, I can't believe how deceiving and sly she could really be. But then thinking about it, I could.

I relies Chappelle hasn't said anything since my outburst. "Should I go now?" I ask.

"Whenever, but soon" he says. That is the green light for me; I want to keep an eye on Carrie more than ever now.

"Ok I'll head over soon." I say hanging up and throwing all my stuff into my suitcase.

I had packed my suitcase, and was on my way to the house within 20 minutes of that phone call. Now that's pretty pathetic - I shouldn't want to beat Carrie at her own game, I'm better than her. I tell myself that over and over again. But then I realize, that's before she decided to bring my boyfriend into this.

At that I step on the pedal harder.

I walk into the house, I still had the keys, and what I heard was music to my ears "-that's really not necessary!" He said.

"I am just trying to make it realistic." She said defensively.

"Yeah right." I heard Tony say, and I can just imagine him scratching the side of his face anxiously right now. "I am not going that far with you. I have a girlfriend whether you choose to acknowledge it or not-" He said.

"Hi, I am back" I said cheerfully heading down the hallway towards _my_ bedroom.

I walked into the bedroom, and moved all of Carrie's perfumes and belongings, placing mine in there place. She looked at me in disgust.

"What are you doing?" She asked angrily.

"Change of plans." I smiled. I wasn't going to let her get to me, I would get to her.

She looked at me, "What?" She asked again.

"I said change of plans" I repeated, with a bitchy smile upon my face. "See, I figured this is my house, and well my husband that you're having your way with - but I'm not giving it all up without a fight." I said right up close to her face.

"You don't decide the plans." She said in a lower voice

I walked over to the closet, threw her clothes out and began hanging up mine. "Ah, but I do. Because this is my house, my closet, my bed, and my husband." I said as I pointed toward the door of my bedroom and said "Out!" She looked at me stunned and began to slowly walk out the door, and as she passed me I whispered "Just trying to make it realistic." Accompanied by another bitchy smile.

Tony walked over to me, trying to keep his movements and everything realistic - because it was more than likely they were watching. I had to beat the urge to lunge at him. "This is the new arrangement." I explained.

"Did Chappelle call to tell you?" I asked straight after.

"Yeah, we'd just got off the phone from him - but we didn't know you was coming tonight." He said to me.

"Yeah, well that part was my decision" I smiled.

"I missed you" He told me. God I wanted to kiss hum right now.

Suddenly he raised his arms and began to yell "How could you do this!? You can't live here! I am living here" I didn't want the moment to be ruined, and I doubt Tony did. But Tony being the rational man he is, knew that he should do something to prevent us doing anything.

I tried not to laugh as I yelled back "Well you and your dirty little mistress will be seeing an awful lot of our _guest_ bedroom then won't you?" I said wickedly. With that he stormed out of the room, stifling a giggle.

This should be interesting.

I unpacked all of my stuff, and went to make a sandwich - Tony and Carrie were in the kitchen.

Carrie had her hands in his pockets, leaning into him and pretending to be all seductive. But I wasn't falling for it, who would?

"Excuse me, I'm going to make a sandwich, so if you don't mind, could you go grope each other somewhere else?" I smiled nastily, and tilted my head to the side. Tony rolled his eyes, and faked a hardened look - Carrie grabbed his hand and led him out of the kitchen.

I thought this was going to be fun. But it's all hard work, pain, and childish games.

I finished making my sandwich and walked down the hallway towards the bedroom when I heard the shower running and Carries voice. "Tony just get in the shower with me. It's no big deal."

"There are no cameras in here and as long as my life doesn't depend on it I am not getting in that shower with you. I'll just wet my hair in the sink before I leave to make it look like I took a shower" He said, shrugging as if it were the most obvious thing.

"Then I guess I'll have to take a shower without you, right in front of your eyes." I heard Carrie say before I heard her climb into the shower.

I hurried into my room and set the sandwich down on my nightstand. I ran into the bathroom and began running the sink on ice cold, and sat on the toilet. A few seconds later a huge smile spread across my face as I heard exactly what I wanted to hear...

"Ouch! Oh my God!" Carrie screamed from the shower.

I am wicked. And it was mean. But I can't watch her get away with it. I can play as hard as she can. I know that I didn't want to play these childish games, but who am I kidding. It's Carrie, she's not going to stop - And I'm no way going to sit back and watch.

If she wants to play with fire. Then she is going to get burned.

Tony jumped "What the hell is wrong with you." He asked Carrie as she jumped out of the shower.

"That bitch ran the cold water to scold me!" She yelled.

Tony smiled as Carrie stormed out.

Carrie stormed into the kitchen - where I was washing up plate, and stormed straight over to me.

"If you've got a problem with me, talk to me like a grown woman!" She yelled.

I smiled, and nodded my understanding, "Oh by grown woman you mean, stealing your co workers boyfriend." I answered back smarmily.

"This is exactly what I am talking about, you know I can't help it." She said

"Oh please, you can't help it? You were the one who proposed the idea of you replacing me, the one who decided to share mine and Tony's relationship with our boss! You want me to treat you like a mature adult?" I asked

"Yes." She nodded her head

"Fine your not a slut, or a whore…your an _adult_eress." I said walking out. Ok maybe that was a cheap-shot, but hey why not? I think to myself. As I walk down the hallway and scan his face as he passes me I can tell he is dying to laugh.

I walked past Tony - still pretending to be mad. And I saw him wink ever so slightly at me, anyone watching wouldn't really have caught it, but I saw it. He still gives me butterflies.

I went to the bedroom and lay on the bed. Thinking about it I felt terrible, I was supposed to come here to do my job, and yet the only thing that motivated me to come was the fact that Tony was here, and I needed to keep Carrie in line.

So I needed to put my job first - for now anyway. I began thinking, and I had an idea, a very simple one, but it'd work.

I headed into the living room, "Tony, can you come in here with your... Twinkie please." I said stifling a laugh.

He gave me a funny look and walked over following me into the hallway.

Carrie followed in minutes later.

"Okay, I know this is obvious - but I need you two to take both neighbors out tomorrow. Make sure you're out all day, so that I can check out their entire house. Surely they must have some clues that they're linked with all the major terrorists groups - And as soon as we find something, CTU will be able to take them in." I said.

"You need to find something not only that will prove their involvement but something that will give us a hint to what their planning - If we take them in its not guaranteed we'll get anything out of them fast enough." Tony explained.

"I know, so I need you to distract them for me" I tell them. "It's important."

"Alright." Tony nodded, he turned to walk away muttering "If it means getting done with this thing - I'll do it"

I smile, Carrie doesn't.

AN: Okay, I'm really sorry for taking so long to update again. I hope you enjoy it. And thanks for reading. :) 


	9. Chapter 9

I head to my room, and begin making plans; sorting through everything we know so far about these so-called-terrorists. And I realise that without a doubt these people are terrorists, its plainly obvious to someone who works in a career where they work with terrorists daily. All the large builds up of money and then large sums of it disappearing and not accounted for. The sudden disappearances of people; always linked back to them. But as obvious as it was to me, this just wasn't the clean cut evidence needed to put them away.

I lay there on my bed planning what I'm going to do tomorrow. Then in walks Tony. "So how you doing?" He asks. He smiles, but I can see something is stressing him out. I know he won't talk to me about it if he doesn't want to, so I don't bother asking; he'll tell me when he's ready.

"I'm just going over some papers." I glance up at him as he focuses on my notes.

"Oh." Is his response.

He's not leaving, and glances at me every now and again; opening his mouth just a fraction as if to speak, and then he closes it as if deciding against it. He definitely has something he wants to say. "Tony, are you ok? Is something bothering you?"

Tony sat down on the bed next to me, "I... Uhm..." Tony tried getting it out. "I think I have to sleep with Carrie..." He managed to get out.

"What?" I asked. This had to come up again didn't it? I seemed shocked, but the truth was that I wasn't. I knew we had to discuss this sooner or later, again. Because we still needed to decided what we were going to do about it. We can't prance around it much longer.

"Yeah, Chappelle and Hammond aren't convinced that the neighbours think were actually involved." He explained.

"So you have to sleep with her?" I ask, this was like déjà vu.

"Wha-" I try to get out, but fail miserably. "You haven't? Have you?" I try again.

Tony looks at me, his eyes telling me what I hoped with all my heart. "No, I just couldn't bring myself to let it happen."He said hanging his head. "And this conversation needs to be in character."

"Oh right." Thinking out loud, I continue. "Ok you're apologizing but I am not excepting it which is why I am giving you a nasty look right now. That's what I'll tell anyone who asks. I am going to storm outside right now, but...I love you." I said with an angry look on my face to make it seem like we were fighting. If not for the conversation we had just had, I might actually find this amusing. I walked outside supposedly seething and slamming the door behind me. On my way to the car our target neighbour ran over to me.

"Hey Jenn, how's everything going. I heard you moved back in."

"Yeah well I am not giving this house up without a fight. He and his mistress can get their own house. I have him sleeping in the guest room." I said angrily, nodding back to the house.

"Oh, well that sounds good. Can't let him get away with that! So why are you so angry?" He asked. I wondered where got the courage to just come over and be so upfront and in your face, nosy. But then I figured with him being such a gossiper, the whole neighbourhood will have heard the story that me and Tony are fighting. And it will add just a little more evidence to making our whole story plausible.

"He just tried apologizing to me! After all the nasty things he said, and having an affair, and all he's put me through he wants to apologize! I don't want his sorry apology! I want my house! And I want him out!" I say, exaggerating every syllable.

"Oh I am so sorry." He says, pulling me in for a hug.

I pull back. "Thanks." I smile at him and he nods back. "Well I better get going I need a bit of space from those two for a minute"

I waltzed straight up to my car and started driving. I didn't know where I was going, I just drove.

I started to think about anything,and everything relating to mine and Tony's current issues. Why couldn't we have a normal life? Boy meets girl, they fall madly in love, and live happily ever after. But no, there had to be an undercover mission and fake affairs. Sighing to myself, I try and think positive; as long as we were together I knew we could face anything.

I drove along, still not knowing where I was heading, when I came across this stunning, seemingly abandoned beach. I parked my car a few blocks away so I could have a leisurely stroll to the beach and clear my head.

As I walked along the beach, something caught my eye. A man wasn't far off behind me. He stopped walking when I looked back. This concerned me, but I turned around and kept walking. My FBI training kicked into auto, and I became strangely aware of all the different tactics I could do and use to get out of this certain situation. But the mood that I was in at the moment didn't want to play cop, so I headed back to my car to see if the stranger continued to follow me. If worse came to worse, I have a stun gun in the glove compartment. I sat in the driver's seat with the door open shaking the sand out of my sandals watching the stranger slowly approaching. I still didn't recognise him, and as I bent down to place my sandal back on my foot, I saw a pair of shows not less than a metre away from where I was seated.

For a second I thought it was Tony - maybe he'd come to surprise me, maybe he pretended he was off to do some grocery shopping. A hundred what-if scenarios including Tony ran through my head. But no such luck.

I look up to see none other than my next door neighbour.

"Oh hey, didn't expect to see you up here," he lied

"Um yeah" I said, trying to fight against frowning at how creepy this guy really was. "I just needed some air."

"You feeling okay?" He asked looking me up and down.

"Yeah, I am going to go home now and take a shower" I smile politely, trying to quickly excuse myself.

He ginned seductively at me, but I personally just found it quite scary.

"You want any company?" He asked me.

"Excuse me?" I asked. Although I knew full well what he meant.

"I'm sorry, maybe another time" He smiled at me again, followed by a wink.

He began to walk to his car, but turned around. "I just thought you might want to teach that husband-" He faked an appalled expression, and continued, "Oops, that _ex-_husband of yours a lesson."

"He's not my 'ex'." I told him, and realised I sounded quite defensive. "_Yet_." I added with an aggressive tone.

Suddenly I realised I was in the same predicament as Tony. Here this guy was, and playing my role, I could use him and his sly sleazy personality to my advantage. I could help myself, and Tony, to get this mission over and done with. All I'd need to do would be to get close enough to the suspect.

I have to go talk to Tony.

I smiled at Peter, and shot him a not-so-obvious flirty glance. I got back in my car and headed straight to the house. I thought I better ring Chappelle first. There was no point in worrying Tony, if Chappelle didn't even want to go along with my idea anyway.

So I dialled his cell number and waited for his answer.

"Chappelle," he said in a monotone voice.

"Hey, it's Jenn," I said-deciding to use my cover name.

"Michelle?" he asked. CTU's connection was so difficult to hack into that most terrorists just didn't waste their time anymore. It wasn't impossible. But it was simply easier to not bother. Mainly because when hacked into they never gave much away anyway.

"Yeah," I said, "Look I have an opportunity." I began to explain.

"What?" Chappelle asked slightly interested.

"I went to the beach, andRangeli followed me, he began to flirt with me, so I was just wondering if you wanted-"

"Great do it." He said.

"Wha-" I managed to get out. I hadn't thought about what I was going to say once he said it was a good idea.

Chappelle must have heard me stutter. "Look, Michelle, obviously we can't force you to do anything you don't want with this man."

I breathed out a sigh of relief.

"But just know this, as soon as you three get what we need, the sooner you can all be out of there." He said simply. "But, we will ask you to go as far as you have to for this information, but you signed up for this when you took the job. Just do what you have to." He explained.

What? I signed up to sleep with a terrorist when I took the job? I didn't see that on the job description. I knew what he meant, but it didn't make me feel any better.

"Okay..." I droned off, and hung up.

I rubbed my forehead as I pulled into the driveway. Our next door neighbour is at the door, Carla Rangeli. I hear their conversation as I approach them.

Carla is talking. "...Would be a pleasure we would love to join you tomorrow. So party of ..." Then she sees me. "Five then?" She asks, smiling at me.

"Four," Tony says.

"Well there's me, my husband, you, Michelle, and your new... girlfriend?" she stumbled.

"Rose." Tony said, "And Michelle won't be attending." He said spitefully.

I smile politely at Carla, and totally blank Tony.

"Excuse me" I say as I walk by Tony who seems to be taking up most of the pathway.

Tony glared at me, and stepped out of my way.

"Oh I see." Carla says awkwardly, and her eyes widen as she realises she just thought out loud. Blushing slightly she began to make her way back to her home.

"So we'll meet you for breakfast at the diner and then we'll go out for the day?" Tony clarified with a polite smile.

"Of course." She said waving goodbye and returning home as her husband pulled into their driveway.

I roll my eyes, and walk into the house.

Carrie was on the sofa when I walked in, I see her sigh. She must be as ecstatic as I am about being back here.

I went straight through my room and into the bathroom, and on the mirror I saw a message. 'Check the third draw'.

I was intrigued by this, so I followed the message, and looked in the third draw. I found a letter, and read it carefully.

_"Dear __Chelle_

_I love you._

_That is the bottom line, and I wish this was that simple, but sadly it's not. Don't give up on us. __Yours, Tony."_

I had a tear running down my face, but I let it fall. I sat on the toilet seat, feeling sorry for myself. And I decided there and then that I had had enough.

I pushed myself up to my feet, and put the note back in the drawer. I took a deep breath and walked out of the bathroom.

I sighed very loudly, and slumped down on my bed.

Then there was a knock on the door. "Come in." I said quietly.

And in walked Peter.

"Your ex let me in," he explained. I think he gets some enjoyment pointing out the fact that Tony is indeed my ex, as he never actually calls him by his name.

"Where's your wife?" I ask trying to stall whatever was coming. Wait stalling? What am I thinking? Stalling what's coming, does that mean I'm willing to go through with this fling, to get the mission completed?

"Grocery store. She'll be gone for at least an hour," he said smiling.

"She will?" I said flirtatiously.

He nodded and slowly walked over to me. He sat on the bed next to me, and began running his hand over my leg, and he slowly ran it up. Strangely it felt good - so I chastised myself for that. I'm hardly supposed to be enjoying this.

He leant in to kiss me. "Wait..." I whispered.

"What's wrong?" He asked softly, pretending to be concerned.

"I just... I don't think this is right, I've been separated from my husband for less than a week... and we hardly know each other," I explained.

He nodded, "I understand" He said. And he leant in and kissed me.

"What are you doing?" I quietly mutter. But end up kissing him back.

"Don't worry so much..." He tells me.

I try to relax as he leans in and begins to kiss me. I try my best to reciprocate, but to be completely honest; my main focus was on not gagging.

"That's better," he breathed before continuing to kiss me. I continue to reciprocate, and as I am finally getting used to how much it disgusts me, my composure goes out the window when Tony walks in with the phone in his hand.

I watch Tony's face flicker with many different emotions; he was hurt, upset, shocked, and I could see how much he was trying to disguise it all. And at that point in time I got very scared, not because of the situation, but because of how well I knew Tony - and if I knew him that well, it was most likely he knew me very well too. And that scared me.

I scowled at Tony as if he had interrupted something. Tony didn't say anything, he stood there, shocked.


	10. Chapter 10

Okay guys, I am so so so so so so (you get it right?) Sorry, for the insanely long wait for this chapter. Hopefully it's worth the wait. Enjoy!

Peter gave me a peck on the lips, "I'll see you later" and then he shot me a flirty glance that made me quiver inside. But pretending to enjoy the way he was looking at me, I shot him a flirtatious look back. He smiled apparently impressed with himself, and turned towards Tony. "And Tony, I suppose us guys can keep this between us? No need for my wife to find out ey?"

Tony slowly seemed to come out of his shock, and replied in such a calm manner I had to look twice to check I wasn't dreaming. "Sure man, your secret is safe with me." And with that he gave Peter a pat on the back; like they'd been buds for years.

Tony looked at me, his face void of emotion. "Uh, phone for you" he said tossing the phone to me and leaving silently.

"Dessler" I answer the phone; obviously the confrontation I just had threw me off a little.

"Jenn?" I hear my nosy across-the-street-neighbour say.

I calmly handle it, like I'd been taught to through my training; lying had to be one of an agents specialities. "Oh, hey Elaine. I am sorry; I thought you were somebody else."

"You know someone called Dessler?" She asked, obviously not very convinced. "As in that's their first name?" She continued, I could tell she was frowning by the tone of her voice.

"Yeah actually a special friend of mine" I would pat myself on the back with the way I'm being so convincing and congratulate myself on my skills as an agent, if it weren't for the current situation I'm in.

"Special friend as in?" She asks, needing the gossip, although she clearly knows what I'm insinuating.

"Well…" I begin, "I thought I'd have a bit of fun myself. Seeing how my husband is a cheating, conniving, son of a -" I drone on but thankfully she interrupts me from my outburst.

I hear laughter on the other end of the phone. "Okay, sweetie, I get the picture…"

Well yeah, it was pretty clear.

"Yeah… So, what's up?" I ask her, having no idea why she would be contacting me, and even so by the phone; as she literally lives next door.

"Well I was watering my garden and I heard about their plans tomorrow - your husband and the Rangeli's - and I was just gonna ask why you didn't say something to him when he like uninvited you right in front of your face? That was pretty obnoxious, I woulda set him straight." She went on, obviously needing her daily gossip fix.

Thinking fast, I replied, "Well I hardly want to spend the whole day with him and his dirty little mistress."

"Oh I see. Makes perfect sense I don't know why I didn't think of that." She said, taking a slight pause, "Well whilst they're gone tomorrow would you like to have a ladies lunch?"

I thought for a moment, I really needed to get something on the Rangeli's soon, and this was giving me the perfect chance to snoop. But, it'll be a bit suspicious if I just want to stay in all day. I'd have to make the effort to keep her off my back.

"Yeah I guess we could meet up for that, I'm quite busy tomorrow though, so could we schedule it for about 2?" I ask; this would give me enough time to snoop, and meet up for lunch.

"Sure thing. Where should we meet?" She asked.

"Um anywhere's fine for me" I respond

"Okay, how about the Dogwood Diner. Do you know where that is?"

"Yeah. Ok see you then." I say politely, before hanging up.

Feeling horribly guilty I gather my strength and head to find Tony. I need to talk to him about the current situation, concerning Peter. I can't imagine what he was thinking when he walked in.

I walked down the hallway "Tony?!" I shouted trying to sound annoyed.

I looked around and he didn't answer. I entered the living room and there they were making out.

Maybe this wasn't the best time to have a talk with him.

I couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt. Am I over analyzing this too much; Tony walks in to see me kissing our neighbour - not knowing that it is part of the assignment, and now here he is making out with Carrie, and from where I'm standing he doesn't seem to be disliking it too much.

I turn around, trying to hide my pain from cameras, and anybody watching. My heart feels like it's slowly breaking. And I can't help but feel that, this is a regular occurrence lately. Is there any point in me and Tony being together if it causes this much pain. Our jobs are too demanding.

Quietly I try to leave the room, but I hear Carrie sigh and mutter something angrily about 'dealing with _it_'. Tony looks straight up and see's me, and I watch a flicker of emotions wash over him; anger, hurt, disgust, disbelief, and somewhere beneath it all I'm sure I can see love. But that may just be me hoping.

He gets up off the couch, his jaw is clenched, and it makes me nervous. "We need to talk." And then he walks into the dining room. Begrudgingly I follow his lead.

When I get in the room, he's resting on the table, and I can see this whole thing is taking its toll on him. We're all going to break soon enough.

He looks at me, and I see his mouth moving, and he's muttering small noises, as if he's trying to formulate a sentence but his mouth and brain don't want to work consecutively. Finally, "How could you do that?"

"How could I do what? Exactly what you and Carrie were just doing?" I angrily shout back.

"Don't you say that! You know how much I didn't want to have to do that! I came to you and talked to you about it. But you, you just jump to the chance of shacking up with Peter!"

I clench my jaw, this isn't how it was supposed to be. We're not supposed to be arguing, the blame isn't really supposed to on either of us. It's hardly any of our faults.

"Tony, I don't want to do this. Okay?" I close my eyes, and take a deep breath, looking straight back up at Tony I continue. "I'm sorry for what you saw; I know it must have hurt you. But I was doing just what you were doing with Carrie. It didn't mean anything. It's just a role I have to play. It's part of my job"

Tony nodded in agreement; I could see he was taking it all. His eyes were sparkling with tears, but he was trying so hard to hold them back. "I couldn't think straight." He swallowed hard and continued. "I didn't know whether you and he were... actually together. Or if you were doing it because you had to. Or... I don't know." He looked straight into my eyes, and moved closer to me. "I just know it hurt so much to see you two together. And I'm so sorry if that's how you feel when you see Carrie and me together."

I swallow, and look at Tony. "I'm sorry too."

Tony walked towards me, and I think he was going to pull me into a hug. And God knows I needed it. But the cameras were everywhere, and we couldn't risk it.

"I should go..." I tell him, hoping he can read what I'm trying to tell him; I don't want him to think I'm giving him the cold shoulder.

Tony looked down, I knew he understood. And I didn't know if we were okay now, but I had to get out of there.

I walk outside and sit on the garden swing; I needed the fresh air.

"Hey stranger."A voice calls off in the darkness. My stomach sinks; this is the last thing I need - Peter.

I respond accordingly anyway, "Hey, you." I say, smiling brightly.

Rangeliwalks out of the darkness and into the light of our back porch. Just then Tony comes out "Jenn...I-" he starts in an apologetic tone.

I stare at the ground, wishing to I could be anywhere but here right now – Or Peter.

Tony's face dropped, but he tried to hide it. He slowly turned and walked back into the house. I felt my heart breaking for him.

Peter walked up to me, "My wife's out..." He said, leaning in for a kiss. I felt him slip his tongue into my mouth, and resisted all my feelings to urge.

We both pulled back minutes later. "Uhm... I don't really feel comfortable doing this while my husband is in there." I say pointing the house. He gave me a look, raising his eyebrows. "Were still married I explain." He nods, in understanding.

"You could come back to mine if you like..." He asked suggestively.

I start to speak, "I uh, I think that-" But I'm interrupted by Tony.

"Jenn, come inside." He ordered. I was confused until he spoke again. "Don't do that. Don't go acting like a whore just 'cause I messed up." He said.

"Hey!" Peter yelled "Who asked you!?" He said getting defensive.

"Look, Pete, I think you should go." Tony said, softly yet sternly.

Peter sighed, and glared at Tony. And what he did next, I'm sure was just to spite Tony. He came over and kissed me right in front of him, very passionately I might add.

He winked at me, and held my hand softly as he walked off, and as he got a few steps away he slowly let go of my hand. It would have been romantic, if Peter hadn't been the one romancing me.

Tony looked at me and sighed. I could see the hurt he was trying to hide. He took my hand and led me inside, but I could tell by the look he was giving me, we had yet to talk again.

He led me into the bedroom. I sat down on the bed. He sat down next to me. "Michelle, I don't know how much more of thisI can take." He said his eyes getting a little glassy "I can't take all this fighting between us - even if it is fake - I can't take having to be romantic with Carrie, and also pretend to like it. I can't take not being able to talk to you, kiss you, and hold you. And what I can't take the most is seeing him touch you, kiss you - and know exactly what's going through his mind. I feel like I am so ready to fall for you. So close to falling head over heels for you but I can't. I just can't. This mission is holding me back. Holding my feelings back. Holding us back. And I can't take it much longer."

"I ...Uh..." What was I supposed to say to that? I felt so bad for him. I felt sorry for myself too. I could see clearly in his eyes that he was hurting, just as I was, and it killed me to know I did this to him.

I sat there silently. I knew I was supposed to say something, I knew I should. But I didn't know 'what' to say. I felt my emotions gathering up inside of me, and I could tell if something didn't sidetrack me, I'd be in tears in a minute.

I went to take Tony's hand, but he shook his head. The cameras. I sighed. "What do you want me to do?" I began, and then the tears fell.

At the sight of my tears his faced turned from hurt to longing. "Baby..."

"TonyI - I can't have this conversation"I breathed deeply. "I love you and all I want to do is escape with you but -" I said, trying desperately to force the rising lump of hysteria in my throat back down. "If we keep talking like this and you keep looking at me like that I'll lose it right here." I began breathing harder "And I can't fall apart right now."

I felt a huge urge to kiss Tony, and it was so strong. I had to be strong. I looked at him through my tears, and apologised with a weak smile. "I've gotta go..." I said meekly. How many times is this going to happen? I wondered.

I let out a deep breath to try and calm myself - It worked. For a matter of seconds. I decided I wanted Tony - I needed him. So I was determined to get to the bottom of this Terrorist organisation, as soon as possible. And at the moment, not thinking clearly, and highly emotional, I'm willing to do anything.

With that I headed over to Peter's, knowing his wife wasn't home. It wasn't the best plan, and in my opinion it was the wrong decision because everyone will end up getting hurt... But I wanted this mission over, and I wanted it over yesterday.

I walked up to his door and knocked. The second he opened the door I lunged at him. We stumbled backwards against the adjacent wall. He reciprocated but pulled back rather soon. "I'm ready now." I said eagerly.

I went for him again but he pulled back and looked at me questioningly. "You didn't seem ready five minutes ago. What happened?"

I had this one planned. "He lead me inside all nice. And he started saying all these nice things, and he had me going, then he said that he forgives me." I said emphasizing the last three words. "_He_ forgives _me_!" I said angrily. "I can't believe him. He apologises to me!As if he is the bigger person! And as if I'm the one who needs forgiving! _I_ have done nothing wrong! He's the one-" I took a breath - he was buying every word."I have done nothing wrong! Who does he think he is? Oh no! The second he said that I didn't even yell-he doesn't deserve my breath! And frankly all the things I could say just wouldn't make my point! They wouldn't hurt him enough." I cupped his faceand smiled. "This will."

He looked at me - "So, you're coming over here, to get back at your husband?" He asked me. I wondered if I should have said that part, surely he's not going to care why I'm here.

"Well..." I asked, lost for words. I forcefully kissed him, "So what if I am"

He shrugged at me and led me to his bedroom.

He pushed me onto the bed and took off my shirt in a hurry and began kissing me passionately, now all I have to do is keep my dinner down.

Forcefully pushing his lower half into me, he grabbed my hips and thrust into me. Kissing me so deeply, I felt as if I would gag on his tongue.

We were interrupted by a door slamming open; it scared me to death, but at the same I was deeply relieved.

"Michelle?" Tony ran into the room but stopped when he saw what was going on.

"Hey pal! Get outta..." He thought for a moment, and then looked to and fro from me and Tony. "Wait what did you justcall her?" Rangeli said, looking back at me. Something had happened behind the scenes that I didn't know about. Peter thought for a second and then he must have realised it must have all been a set up. "Why you slutty little-"

Tony lunged at him and they crashed to the floor. Tony had him in cuffs in less than a minute. I could not believe what was happening, what had happened?

I couldn't believe what I almost had to do; I was so disgusted in myself that I was going to go through with it. I laid there in the bedpropped up on my elbows, in shock at what I would have done. Peter looked at me and I felt all the contents of my stomach rush up. I threw up all over the bed.

A CTU officer stormed in and took Rangeli and Tony rushed over to me. "Hey, hey take it easy." He said wrapping me in his arms. "It's over now." I was breathing hard "It's over" he began to lift me up off the bed, andout of the mess "Let's get you outta here" I began to cry.

I sobbed as Tony pulled me into an SUV, supplied by CTU.

"I don't get it..." I said confused, willing Tony to explain to me.

"Well basically, the shortened version is; Chappelle called me, explaining they had apprehended Rangeli's wife, and that she broke pretty quickly. So I headed over to tell you... I had no idea you were going to go that far..." He trailed off.

I sighed as I tried to get my sobbing under control, but miserably failed "I'm so sorry... I didn't want to. I just I had no idea what to do..." I breathed and he waited patiently. I calmed a little "I wanted it to be over, and I just, I just wasn't thinking straight because all I could see was what I wanted." He looked at me as his eyes became watery and he pulled me in for a tight hug. "All I wanted was you." I sobbed. "And I was ready to do whatever it took to get it..." I burst into sobs again.

"Shhh." He said into my ear. "It's okay. It's over. I'm here. You didn't do anything wrong. It's over. I'm here." He whispered these things into my ear quietly the whole ride back to CTU.

Tony and I arrived at CTU, after about an hours' drive. I fell asleep on the ride back - Tony was softly caressing my back up and down, and playing with my hair. It was the most comfortable I had been with him, throughout this whole situation.

"Chelle...Chelle..." I heard someone whispering, and gently shaking me out of unconsciousness. I was so tired; I couldn't fight the sleep that was overtaking me. The next thing I felt was someone's soft lips, on mine, a soft and sweet kiss. I slowly opened my eyes.

"We're here" Tony said softly, looking straight into my eyes.

"Okay." I said in a sleepy whisper, as we climbed out of the SUV. We started in towards the back door of CTU and headed towards the locker rooms .

"Wanna go take a shower?" He asked me. I nodded my head; Yes I certainly did. He lead me to the women's shower and he went into the men's. After the showerI felt so much better, andI no longer smelt like puke. I walked out of the locker room and he was there waiting for me.

"We're allowed to go home and Ryan saidwe can dothe debrief tomorrow." He said gently. I nodded and leant back against the wall, closing my eyes sleepily. He looked around and leant in for a soft kiss. Until we heard the voice that had partially been the source of our anxiety for the past few weeks.

She walked up to us smiling. "Well, I bet you two are glad it's over." She said, and at first I actually thought she was being genuine. But unfortunately she continued, "Well, I'm slightly disappointed, I mean - who knows how far we would have gotten." She smirked towards Tony. I felt anger rise in my chest, and my hands clenched.

Tony sensed this, so he handled the situation with a calmness that I seem to have lost lately. "Look Carrie, we've had a rough couple of weeks, so if you'll excuse us..." He said, taking my hand, as he began leading us out of CTU.

As we walked out of CTU, I could feel Carrie's stare, but I didn't care because now I had Tony and nothing was holding us back.

We got in a CTU car, as both of our cars were at their rightful places. "So, Uhm..." Tony started. I looked at him, trying to encourage him to go on, "Whose house shall we go to?" He asked me, almost as if he expected me to turn down the offer of us going home together.

I smiled genuinely at him, "As long as I'm with you, and can sleep, I really don't mind." I tell him.

He smiled, and I took his hand in mine as we drove to our destination. Minutes later I was being gently woke up, again. "Honey... come on, were here." I heard him whisper in my ear.

I smiled at him lightly and picked myself up. We both got out of the car and Tony thanked the driver. We stumbled in Tony's front door, and I didn't even have the energy to snoop. He just led me straight to his bedroom. He threw me some clothes and we got changed, quietly and shyly. We crawled into the bed, and as soon as skin touched skin we both sighed contently; Tony wrapped his arms around me, and we began to drift off. I whispered "It's over."

I heard him mutter back, "Thank god." He opened his eyes and looked at me. "Goodnight sweetie. I love you"

"I love you too." I whispered, snuggling closer to him.

As we both drifted off to sleep, I realised it was over – and after the hell CTU had put us through these past weeks, I knew that me and Tony would never again return to that place. Because we were going to be together for_**ever**_.

Okay, I know the last line is like sooo cheesy, lol, but hey. I hope you enjoyed it. And that is now the end! Once again, I am so sorry for the long wait!


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